6 Things To Consider About Affairs
When you spy on
your suspected cheating spouse, please make sure
you consider all the possibilities you might encounter
and whether you can handle them.
Have you considered
the many situations that spying might uncover?
Can you imagine the worst thing you might find?
Predict what your response will be to the worst-case
scenario. Are you ready? Here are some specific
questions to ask:
1) Do I have friends
I can count on for support if I discover the worst?
Do they know I might need them? Have I told them
exactly how they might help me? Do I have the
capacity to stand back from the deep emotions
and not get mired or lost in destructive thoughts
2. ) How have I handled
emotional pain in the past? What if it gets almost
unbearable? If I encounter the worst possible
emotional hurt and pain, do I have a therapist
I can contact immediately and see soon to help
me through the rough spots?
3.) You see the signs of
a cheating spouse. What will be my strategy for
what I find? Do I have a strategy for the different
scenarios? Do I have a strategy to confront or
not confront my spouse? How, when and under what
circumstances will I confront him/her?
4) What kind of strategy
will I have for self-care? What will I need to
do to keep myself functioning somewhat effectively?
5) Do I have a coach or
an objective someone who knows about cheating
husbands and cheating wives and who can help me
develop strategies and goals for confrontation
and self-care? Someone to keep me focused and
working on these strategies and goals?
6) Do I know what kind of
affair I might face? Do I know the prognosis for
that kind of affair? Have I educated myself about
affairs and what I must do to effectively resolve
and move through this crisis?